


VHS Tapes

by Katyasmattel



Category: RuPaul's Drag Race (US) RPF, RuPaul's Drag Race UK RPF
Genre: AlotOfIt, F/F, Fluff, Nostalgia, Vhstapes, dragrace, katyazamo, looking back through old home videos, trixiemattel, trixya - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-26
Updated: 2021-01-26
Packaged: 2021-03-18 19:47:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,673
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28997730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Katyasmattel/pseuds/Katyasmattel
Summary: Just a little series of Trixie and Katya looking back through old home videos and watching themselves and their relationship grow.
Relationships: Trixie Mattel/Katya Zamolodchikova
Comments: 4
Kudos: 15





	1. Birthday party

There was an excitement in Katyas chest that made her head float pleasantly and her lips turn up as she walked through the door into her cosy little house. It hadn't been a particularly stressful day at work, but she knew as soon as she got to the lounge she would be greeted with the glossy image of her wife, probably sprawled out on the couch wrapped up in those pink blankets she loves so much. The mere thought made her insides melt and her tense shoulders relax. 

Trixie was like a safe haven for Katya, a warmth that she could always rely on to be right there when she needed her. Ready and willing with open arms she could wrap herself up in and get lost in the pure comfort of her presence. 

The blonde had always been a wild child, outgoing and eccentric, but around Trixie she found she could also have moments of complete peace in between all the chaos. The buzzing in her mind and the static practically fizzling from her finger tips could all be tamed and soothed by the beautiful blonde woman she got to come home to everyday. That fact was something that she didn't think she could ever live without. 

When she finally kicked her shoes off and entered the open plan space, she was sure enough greeted with the sight of her goddess of a wife, however not quite in the state she imagined. 

Trixie was perched in the middle of the hard wood floor completely surrounded by old vhs tapes, beaten up labels peeling from the plastic neatly marked in black sharpie as she scanned her eyes over each one. She didn't even notice Katya come in until she picked one of them up inspecting the layer of dust that coated the scene. "Kat you're home!" she smiled scrambling to stand and tred between the tapes to make her way over before engulfing her in a tight hug. "Baby what is all this?" She couldn't remember her brining anything in like this when they moved in, but all of them seemed to have her name written in pretty handwriting each with the date and description inscribed on the front. 

"My mom found em when she was cleaning out the garage today and dropped them off. I thought we could watch a few, you know reminisce" the blonde spoke sweetly, waving the remote in front of her and pointing at the Tv with bright eyes. As katya moved her gaze onto the screen, displaying a sort of grainy, wavy looking picture of what she knew to be a very young Trixie her confusion melted and she followed her to the couch. "Look at this" she giggled pressing play and laying her head on her chest wrapping an arm around her waist. A warm feeling sat in Katyas chest as she snuggled closer, bringing a hand up to her hair and running her fingers through it as she watched the paused picture come to life. 

"Trixie look at me darling" the soft voice of what Katya recognised as Trixie's mother spoke trying to get the attention of the tiny blonde still too immersed in her new barbie doll. She did finally look up after a few seconds, huge smile plastered across her face and an amazing bright pink dress swaying around her hips. Valerie had made it herself and put layers upon layers of tule underneath the skirt so it made her look even smaller than she already was buried in the fabric. It fit perfectly though, the sequins catching the light and reflecting through the camera lens to make it all the more dazzling. "Happy birthday sweetheart". The little Trixie skipped towards the camera now she knew the attention was on her, barbie still clutched in her hands as she looked right into the lens with wide inquisitive eyes. "You wanna tell the camera how old you are today?". 

"Hellooo my name is Beatrice Elizabeth Mattel and I am five years old todayyy" she sang looking up to her mother a proud grin on her face as she swung her arms by her sides

Trixie giggled into Katyas chest feeling her join in before she grabbed her hand, fingers digging into her skin with anticipation. She'd already watched a part of this one to check the tape player her mother gave her was working and she knew exactly what was coming next as laughter bubbled in her stomach. "Wait for it" She spoke and in almost the same second another little girl barrelled into the shot squealing at the top of her lungs and heading straight for Trixie. "TRIXABEELLLEEE" the girl shouted running into her at full speed and wrapping her arms around her shoulders, the little blonde laughing obnoxiously loud as she caught her. 

Katya let out a cackle as she watched herself, all messy her and muddy face struggling for breath with hands on her flushed cheeks as she stopped. She looked the absolute polar opposite to Trixie's pristine dress and doll like features, to this day she had no idea why Trixie even tolerated her back then. "Katya honey slow down you're gonna hurt yourself" Val said from behind the camera the girls now whispering and giggling to themselves before they both looked up to the woman. "Ryan would you get this girl some juice". 

"I wanna help" Trixie smiled before skipping off leaving just Katya pulling faces and giggling to herself into camera. "You wanna say Happy Birthday to Trixie so she can watch this when she's a little older". Katya nodded before clearing her throat in order to sound serious. Trixie could hear her mother's faint giggle from behind the camera before she began her speech, excitedly jumping on the spot. She never could keep still. 

"Happy birthday Trixabelle I mean uh Trixie. Umm well I hope we stay best friends forever and ever....and that you keep erm inviting me to the tea parties because erm even though that Kitten is jealous that I'm your best friend erm she has Miss Bunny so I think that I can still be your best friend and we can keep playing..and uh..yeah". After she was finished she bounced of the balls of her feet for a second before Trixie made her way back over and handed her a small cup which Katya immediately downed in two seconds before wiping her lip letting out a sigh. 

"We're gonna go on the bounce house and see who can go the highest, I've been winning up to now". The younger Katya stated proudly grabbing her little counterparts hand and dragging her out of frame before the tape cut off and they were left in silence. Katyas eyes drifted from the imagine of their tiny fingers intertwined down to where they were holding each other now and an overwhelming pang of longing and affection washed over her. 

She's never really thought about it before but she'd really been holding Trixie's hand for almost thirty years now. They'd gone from tea parties to dinner parties, from childhood best friends to lovers. The both of them have been the through so much and yet Trixie was still here holding her hand with all the compassion in the world, it made her instantly squeeze tighter as Trixie lifted her head. 

"You were so adorable" The older blonde cooed brushing hair out of her face Trixies eyes melting into her. "What happened?" She giggled the trance now broken as Trixie scoffed playfully and slapped her hand away getting up and taking the tape out. " shut up you monster. Did you see you? Come on let's watch another one, how about...this one?"


	2. Talent show/ 4th of July

When Trixie picked up the next tape she brushed her fingers over the faded marker smiling down at the title before bringing her eyes up Katya. Butterflies immediately erupted in her stomach with the way the soft brown melted like pots of honey into her blue and a smirk played on her glossed lips. It wasn't a new feeling, it had been present since they were around fifteen but somehow every time it would swim in her system she'd drown in everything Trixie and not want to ever come back up . Her whole body would be submerged in a warm serenity that would wash from surface of her skin deep into their tethered souls and create tidal waves of affection that would anchor to the small moment. 

Trixie-School Talent Show 1996. 

The musician had started playing the guitar when she was twelve and she faintly remembered this day and the happiness that followed, nostalgia filling her head. Almost a year after she'd played her first chord, she was standing in front of her very first audience the lights on her face and adrenaline pumping in her system. 

By this point, her and Katya had spent their elementary school years together and had grown impossibly closer spending almost everyday together. Katya would sneak out of her parents house even then and cycle over to Trixies estate just to climb into her bedroom window and hear her play. The way the little blonde would be completely entranced by her delicate fingers plucking over the strings and the lilt in her newly found voice was a concept that she didn't think she would ever grow tired of. She was right, even now when they'd spend rainy days with Trixie sat in their bedroom window, soft melodies floating through the room and katya sipping on coffee with pure love in her eyes she still got that feeling that connected them. 

One thing she also remembered about that day was how Katya had offered to go on stage with her to calm her nerves.Choreographed a whole quintessentially Katya routine to dance alongside her singing, just to make her feel more comfortable. They were only young, but the more Trixie thought about it, the more it became clear they were meant to be together, like the universe had somehow intertwined their paths from birth. Weaved their experiences together before they even found who they were let alone each other. 

Popping the tape into the box and waiting for it to load she sat back alongside her counter part and pressed play with tentative eyes the light of the tiny stage fading up. The quiet murmur of the school hall died down and all focus was on her as the first note range through the speakers. She could almost feel the tension the same way she could that day, knowing her parents were in the audience pointing a camera on her with the rest of the school casting their gaze onto her. 

A smile immediately floated onto Katya face as she realised which memory she'd chosen and pulled her in to sit her in her lap, her arms grounding her and making her relax. Smooth skin thrummed as she watched the both of them. Trixie getting lost in the feeling of the beaten up wood against her skin and the strings making indents on her fingertips while Katya pranced around her to the tune of Dolly's Here you come again. Dolly had always been someone she'd looked up to. Endless posters and albums were scattered around her childhood bedroom in between old vintage barbie photographs and books despite her mother's defiance. They'd even talked about the possibility if they were to ever have a child of their own together she want to give her the name.Bubble gum pink and pretty blonde hair was the epitome of beauty to her back in high school and it was where the whole dearly loved doll aesthetic came from. It even developed from her outfits to her hair for a couple of years and she was known as the pretty girl with the cotton candy hair for a while before the honey blonde made an appearance again. 

Trixie watched the nervous smile on her younger self's face as she became more comfortable swaying from side to side as she sang and felt a strike of pride in her blood. Soft hums vibrated in her chest, eyes still glued to the screen and she moved to the slow beat in Katyas lap watching herself song through the chorus her eyes closed and head leaning on the neck of the guitar. She didn't even notice Katyas hands were stoking into her hair until moved them down to her shoulders and leaned forward to rest her chin in the space of her neck. 

"You're so talented" the girl mumbled making Trixies breath hitch as she placed a light kiss to her skin burying her nose further into her. Katya breathed in her scent the smell of her lavender shampoo filling her nose mixed with a little sweat probably from hauling the boxes of tapes earlier. "I was so nervous" she replied leaning back into her touch as the song came to a close and Katya hit her final pose. "Yeah, but look. People have always loved your singing, you're a natural born performer" her voice was still quiet as she moved kisses up to her earlobe and onto her hair the audience now erupting with cheers and applause on the video.

As they both bowed and walked off stage hand in hand memories of what happened next floated into her mind. She'd pulled Katya into a tight embrace after riding herself of the guitar and cried into her hair at the relief. "That was awesome" the little voice mumbled still not letting go. "They loved you!" Katya spoke back a beaming smile across her lips. 

They didn't end up winning in the end, but that didn't matter Trixie was just proud she got up in front of people and conquered her nerves. Plus their parents still treated them to ice cream afterwards, which meant she and Katya could share a cherry sundae and watch the carnival that was always on the sea front from the diner window. 

"Okay okay it's my turn" Katya spoke when the video cut out letting Trixie crawl off of her lap and pull the blanket around herself as she watched Katya flick through the tapes. She'd forgotten about most of these, but now that she thought about it she had the camera out all the time, especially when she went through her phase of wanting to be a photographer in her teen years. Art and design had won out eventually, but she still remembers pulling the camera out at unexpected times, most of them being when she was around Trixie. The tapes must've made their way to the girls house after they'd watched them as kids, and after that they'd slipped from her mind until now. 

After browsing for a few moments she picked one up and replaced the tape. 

Katya- 4th of July 1999

"You remember this?" Katya asked a devilish smile on her face. "Of course I do, I was freakin' out the entire day" she giggled watching the screen fizzle and the image of a now sixteen year old Katya in frame. She'd started to do her makeup now and those signature Smokey eyes burned into the lens she filmed herself dimly lit with the late night sky. "Hey so it's the 4th of July and I'm at Trixie's annual barbecue" she spoke as a giggle could be heard in the background. "Katya what are you doing?" It asked her eyes moving away and looking at someone opposite. "I'm documenting Violet. Some day when I'm old and in a nursing home I wanna remember myself looking this gorgeous and be able to show my kids what 1999 looks like" she explained panning around the scene showing Trixie's back yard, fairly lights hung on the fence and the lawn full of people. 

"So what's it like being able to see yourself now you're old" Trixie laughed Katya hitting her arm and scoffing with a chuckle. "Shut up you're just as old as me" she retaliated before carrying on watching. Her house didn't look that different, still had the shed at the end of the garden and Trixie's pool lit dimly in the moonlight. She vaguely remembers that earlier that day one of the boys had pushed Trixe in and she'd stomped of completely humiliated her dress and hair completely ruined. Of course Katya followed her and helped her clean up, soothed the sobs and told her it was okay. 

She didn't know it then but that was the tipping point for Trixie. For almost a year before that she'd been battling the feeling she had for Katya, but when she'd held her cheek and wiped off her makeup said she was beautiful either way and encouraged her to get back to the party that's when she couldn't deny it any more. 

By this point Trixie was in the kitchen, practicing how she was going to tell her and after a whole afternoon of almost saying it and stopping herself she decided enough was enough. 

When Katya turned the camera back onto herself she was about to say something else to camera when a timid looking Trixie appeared in the frame behind her. "Look how cute you look, just about to tell me you love me" Katya was loving this, finding it completely adorable how Trixies cheeks flushed the same was they did back then. 

"Oh my god shut up. Why did you pick this one" she groaned hiding her face in her hands. "I have to talk to you" The younger Trixie said making Katya whip her head around. 

"Oh do you now I wonder what you had to say to me" Katya laughed only making Trixie throw a couch cushion in her direction. 

"Yeah of course" the young girl answered before she dropped the camera and the picture only showed flashed of green and black. She'd expected the tape to end there only remembering she went to talk to Trixie, but as the video kept running and they made their way into Trixies room the picture finally stilled as Katya placed it on the desk. Both of them stared at it in astonishment for a moment as the half picture blurred on the screen.

They hadn't watched this one before, Katya just saw it as a throwaway back then thinking it was only a short video of Trixies yard but now it was something much more. They couldn't hear what either of them were saying, they barely could even see, it was just a half image of both of their bodies from the neck down but when Katya caught sight of her place a hand on her forearm Trixie's stomach flipped. Neither of them remembers what they said except the confession itself but the kiss wash fresh in both their minds as she watched their bodies press together and hands interlock.


	3. Ice Hockey

The next tape Katya had chosen with a huge grin on her face and nostalgia warming her features. All through college she was always known as the quirky girl who was a little off beat with endless amounts of energy, making offhand comments and strange analogies that would just often baffle anyone around her. People didn't really get her way of thinking, they just weren't really on her very unique wavelength, aside from Trixie of course. 

However when she'd decided freshmen year   
that she would channel of all her chaos into something new to try and make some friends, and just by chance the sports department had a particularly desperate teacher looking for willing kids to join the ice hokey team, she took a chance and it was the best decision she could've made. Turns out ice hockey wasn't a very popular sport for the girls, they all wanted to be cheerleaders or play volley ball so it wasn't easy trying to convince the coach she could do it, but when katya stepped out on the ice for tryouts hockey stick comfortably in hand and the helmet guarding her face sturdily she immediately got lost in the game and went into a world of her own. Eventually she completely outshone every jock in the building, her gymnastics experience giving her the agility and speed some of the boys just didn't have and the technical skill and balance that others had to work on. All eyes were on her and she quickly became the star of the Boston University Flyers and got put on the prestigious team despite being the only girl and people really started to se her talent. 

Katya- Flyers playoffs 2001   
As the grainy picture came to life once more the sound of the crowd immediately blared through the speakers as the two watched the players fly in all directions. For a moment the camera teetered as if the person holding it was searching for her in the whirlwind of huge boys before it finally focused and Katya saw an eighteen year old version of herself pure concentration in her eyes. She remembers the feeling of being in a game like this perfectly, high stakes and even higher tension making her zero in on just the ice and the puck. Nothing else in the world existed in those moments and for her it was another way to still the buzzing in her head. Cold wind blew through her hair as she watched herself focus on the game, narrowed eyes following the puck as it was passed form player to player. The booming nasally voice of the commentator could be heard in the background along with the unmistakable cheer of Trixie who was clearly somewhere near the camera. 

The young blonde had gone to the all important game with Katyas brother to watch her beloved girlfriend play and at that point she was securely wrapped up in a warm purple hat and scarf clutching a coffee as she watched in awe. Rowdy sports games had never really been her scene, but if truth be told she would've gone anywhere to see Katya in her element to watch her with that look in her eyes. 

"And here comes number forty eight Zamo from the outside, just missing Baxter and weaving her way past Connelly with incredible skill. Now this girl has got some speed like you wouldn't believe Chris, highest scoring player of the season, can surely take a hit and at only eighteen is the star of the Boston university flyers. Trust me, tonight the Bulldogs have to watch out for this force of nature if they want any chance of taking home the win". Katya gigged at the ridiculous voice as she carried on watching eyes glued to the screen. She hadn't played in a while, maybe her and Trixie should go to the ice rink sometime soon just so she can feel the skates on her feet and the wind in her hair again. "And here she comes breaking through Walker and Bolton's defence with no problem, lines it up for a perfectly for a beautifully clear shot she takes her chance and YES ITS THROUGH THE NET. STRAIGHT THROUGH MCCOOKS LEGS. Well there you have it folks there's just no escaping the blonde bombshell that is number forty eight, Katya Zamo". The crowd around then erupts into a storm of cheers as the camera follows Katya gliding around looking out to each side throwing her arms out clutching her stick with pride. 

After a couple of seconds she catches the eyes of a beautiful blonde wrapped up purple and stops in her tracks before skating over to the sidelines and taking out her mouth guard. Suddenly the camera slides onto to Trixie as she stares back her face lit up with joy despite the pink on her cheeks from the cold. "That was amazing!" Trixie smiled Katya leaning up against the side popping her hip out with a cocky smile. "Yeah well gotta show em how it's done baby" the girl beamed clicking her tongue and giggling in her direction. 

"God I was such a narcissist" Katya laughed watching the scene. She vaguely remembers that her gear is still in the garage, she wonders if it still fits. "No, you were just showing off because I was there, I believe that was the same game you got a penalty for doing pirouettes around the players " Trixie chucked remembering how she would purposely look towards the blonde at any given moment just to show off her moves before getting sucked back into the game and eventually earning them a win. 

For a second the video cut off again but came back on a few moments later. Clearly Alex, katyas brother had stopped the recording and put two different videos onto the same tape before putting it in the garage. This time it was the at end of the game, the crowd were filtering out with either joy spread across their faces or dissatisfaction staining their smiles and Katya was the last one as usual on the ice. Trixie had the camera now and was just filing her skating, watching her pretend the crowd was still there screaming her name with a giggle. When she finally caught sight of her girlfriend though she looked directly into camera waving before sliding over to her. 

"Come on, I wanna go home it's freezing in here" Trixie told her watching her cold breath float across the frame. "Well yeah dude it's an ice rink duh what were you expecting the Miami heat" she laughed earning a burning stare from the blonde. In a second she realised what she said then her looked down with guilt and a hint of a smile. "Sorry, been around the guys too much". Trixie actually couldn't help but grin at that before she grabbed a hold of the front of her helmet bringing her face close. "Get your ass into that locker room now...dude" she imitated the camera still rolling but focused on the number on her jersey. Katya nodded before stepping off the ice taking off her helmet and finding Trixie's hand before interlocking their fingers. "Hey..." the younger of the two started now pulling the camera into focus again. Katya looked up confused before Trixie pulled out snickers bar from her pocket and tossed in her direction the girl watching it as her eyes lit up. 

Every time they'd visit the ice rink for practice Trixie would always take a trip to the vending machine and get her a mandatory snickers as she liked to call them and Katay was amazed that today was no different. Trixie really did do everything to make her happy and it made her face heat up. "I'm proud of you, you did so good today. My hot hockey star girlfriend" she laughed as they walked towards the locker room. Suddenly the confident jock in Katya quickly wore off and now her fingers tingled as she was once again completely smitten in her little Trixie bubble. It was a different type of calm around her, hockey let her focus have a goal and a set of rules to follow which kept her brain in line but with her it was like her mind was floating, surrounded by clouds of affection that kept her head clear and serene. 

"I love you" she stuttered out not really knowing what else to say to express what she was feeling. Usually she was filled with the most colourful remarks and could talk for hours on any subject but her love for this girl seemed so monumental no amount of words would ever do it justice. "Forever?" Trixie asked a devilish smile creeping onto her lips. This was a little game she liked to play ever since they were kids. Katya had always been an overexcited child and from the day she told her they'd be friends 'Forever and ever' it kind of stuck around and friends for ever and ever became much more. Now it was a promise. "Forever and ever baby" she laughed before the camera cut off again.


End file.
